WOW!!!! I woke up on Friday, May 18th and my scale read 197.2 – for those of you who know me and followed my other blog This Is Me Now – you know that those numbers meant that I have lost 100 pounds. I have literally been working toward this goal for almost 3 years (I think that it’s been 2 years, 11 months and 2 weeks).
I haven’t been blogging about my weight/weight loss efforts for almost a year now and I think that it was simply because I was afraid to really share how I was doing – it can be a bit overwhelming to let people into something so personal. But I’m ready to start “sharing” again because I honestly believe that if I can do it anyone can. I struggled with my weight for many years, but I now know that I struggled with my weight because I struggled with not valuing myself – freeing my body of 100 pounds has been liberating to say the least….but loving myself has honestly been like lifting 500 pounds off of my shoulders. I struggled with my self-worth long before I started gaining weight. I was just super active in college with volleyball. I didn’t start getting heavy until the end of 2000/beginning of 2001 while we were living in Albuquerque Albuquerque to South Jordan I was 220 pounds – I was 185 when we moved there in January 2000. Ironically, I had gained my “dieters mentality” while we were living in Albuquerque – it was the first time I had tried to diet and when I failed at it I gained back the weight I’d lost and added another 35 pounds. I have tried many, many different diets…and I would have success and then “mess up” and then I’d give up and start the cycle all over again. It was an absolute disaster.
I will share specifics of some of my dieting adventures in future blogs. I can already tell this is getting a bit long. So let me cut to the chase of what finally clicked for me……..
At the end of May 2009 we moved from St. Anthony , ID (still miss that place) to Prescott Valley , AZ.
- I joined the YMCA. They provided childcare for my 3 girls and I was able to go and spend some time clearing my head and taking care of a body that I had mistreated and neglected for many, many years.
- I made some quick changes to my eating. It wasn’t drastic or “dietee”. I stopped drinking regular soda and stuck with diet. I joined Livestrong.com for free, set up my profile and figured out how many calories I would get to eat each day to lose 2 pounds a day. From there I just started making small, manageable changes to how and what I was eating every couple of weeks. Just by doing these things I lost my first 55 pounds.
- MOST IMPORTANT: I acknowledged that there wasn’t going to be a quick fix or magic pill that would make me change. Instead of hating my body and being at odds with it, I listed all of things it had done for me – no matter how much I weighed – with my body I had carried twins full term and they were beautiful, healthy and sweet (I weighed 270 at the end of that pregnancy) I hadn’t had any complications with my delivery; I had also carried my beautiful Olivia full term AND been able to work as a waitress during that pregnancy (I weighed 295 at the end of that pregnancy). Looking at my body it a loving, compassionate way changed my perspective. It changed the way I saw myself. Once I started seeing ME (and being honest with myself about my eating, etc) it was like I was finally seeing myself through the eyes of the people who loved me the most and my Creator. I was telling Jeremy the other day that I felt just as happy in this picture:
When I had only lost my first 10 pounds and we took the kids to Slide Rock in Sedona, as I did in this picture:
When I was getting ready for date night with the hubs 100 pounds lighter.
Losing weight has been a physical manifestation of my inner change. Start small – make changes you can see yourself doing for a really long time – and love yourself in the process.
I can only share what has worked for me – I am not a trainer or a nutritionist – just a girl who found a way to change her body and change her life.
Until next time.
